Archive for December, 2005

christmas time is here

I am tired.

Christmas isn’t my favorite holiday. I don’t like the cold. I don’t like the crowds. I like the church part for weird reasons and I like Christmas morning because my family has a great routine and it feels good to have something that happens every year, the same way.

But I’m tired…this past week has been hard and the last month has been long and twisted. I am ready to move back to Keene and it’s not happening as quickly as I like. I feel like I’m being held hostage at this point-and that’s not cool.

And I’m tired.

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let me in

“It’s better to leave a misdeed
undone.
A misdeed burns you afterward.
Better that a good deed be done
that, after you’ve done it,
won’t make you burn.”

-Dhammapada, 22, translated by Thanissaro Bhikkhu

I was going to blog about how I was wronged yesterday by a coworker, insulted, bitchslapped, humiliated, chastised. About how frighteningly angry I was. How I wanted to burn everything in the world and scream and pound my heels and fists into the floor. About all the terrible things I want to shout. About the thoughts running through my head. About the awful things I DID say.

This arrived in my email this morning.

I let it go.

I am shutting up.

I am forgetting.

I am forgiving.

I am ok.

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david

In memory of David Alan Taylor
April 4th, 1963 – January 11th, 1996
I miss you.

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